In working online, the intersections of being openly gay, mixed with an upbringing where innuendo was the form of humour with his parents, and religion are something that has to be navigated so delicately but also directly.
In This Project
Michael's Upbringing
In the years before public school, neither of his parents attended church or participated in organized religion. Until I approached my teenage years, I didn't realize my mother had been married and divorced before his birth.
The divorce would force my mother from the catholic church. It would be later revealed that I was the product of an unexpected mistake, and my parents would marry a couple of months before I was born.
My parents would shuffle my sister and me out the door to go to church when I was in Grade 1 so they could have 'alone time'. We were invited to invite our parents, and my mother came with us to a Mother's Day service. It would kickstart the majority of my childhood years to be part of religion.
We bounced between Lutheran, United, and eventually, in the final years, were in the Pentecostal church. My parents loved working with the children's programs, and they would become part of the leadership team in the final two churches.
Being Pushed Out of Churches
Both churches pushed my parents out the door once they realized the church was lying and misguiding the congregation financially. Both confronted the leadership of the church, and they found themselves on the outside, looking inward. Basically instructed to keep quiet, but it was too much for my parents to hold to themselves. Bullied by the leadership, they had no choice but to leave or face off with the abuse of power.
My parents pulled us from one church and moved us to another, and the same issues occurred in the next church. But it was realized within a year, and by the time I was 13 years old, we were pulled from church for the remainder of my childhood and would be my entire adult life.
It is Difficult To Trust
I struggled with my sexuality and would sit through the preachers railing against what would be my future identity. A lot of name-calling and damnation. Leading to my parents echoing the same remarks at home. If I heard "Adam and Steve" one more time... it solidified for me the fear of my own self with the world.
With my parents having access to the financial records of one of the churches, my parents couldn't afford to go on holidays. However, the pastors were making serious money with free housing and much more. With the misleading tactics to get the congregation to give more money than they probably could afford, it really upended my parents' faith in religion.
There are most likely good churches making a positive impact on communities, but time and time again, you get the stories of abuse of power. Words are meaningless, and it's all about the power struggle. Let's be honest, no one wants to be taken advantage of.
Once they removed themselves from church, they could afford to go on holidays and do fun family vacations. Until then, the extra money was being funnelled to the church with little left behind.
Moved Forward
I would move forward to adopting life without religion as a core belief. I believe there is potentially something bigger than I, but I am not educated enough to know what it is. However, I don't revolve my life around that core belief either.
I don't care what beliefs people have, and I don't believe that their beliefs should be my own. I want to live in a world with as little friction as possible, and I feel that religion is the cause of a lot of wars, fighting and community breakdowns.
Former Partner
My former partner was an ostracized Jehovah's Witness. Forcing him to question everything and remove key people from his life, including family. From these relationships, the idea of birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas and special occasions was removed, and the years went on without them.
I would carry this forward into my nearly 20-year-old relationship with Daniel, where we do not observe the holidays or occasions. It makes life simpler, and we don't step on others' beliefs that people like us shouldn't be celebrating certain occasions.
While we love decorating for Christmas, we do it sporadically and not every year. We do it for the colour and theming, not for the religious intent.
Everyone deserves fairness, regardless of their culture or beliefs. I don't favour any religion over the other because I don't practice anything religious. I look at people as people, not for how they choose to observe what their life means.
People have the right to do what they want with their life. It's not up to me to tell anyone they should do it one way or another.
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