Some of us look at our balls as half empty and others look at half full. These are classic complaints, some major eye-rollers!
You can expect sarcasm so if that doesn't float your boat, click away!
Yarn Squeaks On Hook
Oh sweetie pies, is your yarny warny squeaking on your little hook of yours! Oh my gawd, put the house up for sale and move to another area of the world!
You know they invented soap just for squeaking crochet hooks eh! Yeah, rub that shaft with some soap but make sure you don't enjoy it too much though. It makes the hook more lubricated and should get rid of the squeak! Others online have solutions and I sure there are doozies!
Yarn Balls Fall Between Sofa Cushions
Gee, I wonder what I can do to fix that solution? Hmmm... that's a hard one. Oh, I got it, don't leave the ball on the cushion. I know, I'm a rocket scientist.
You know, bowls are more than just for cereal, soup and big slabs of ice cream. Put the ball in the bowl and let it roll around inside the bowl.
Knots in Balls
Definitely call the yarn police on this one. We are living in a fast-paced, have to have it now for as cheap as possible. Knotless balls up the cost as there will be more landfills because fibre is fickle. We are in a creative industry where we start and stop colours. So if the ball is the same colour, cut the knot out, start the strand. Yes, inconvenient but trust me, you will eventually get over it.
However, the knot is in a ball of transitioning colour yarn. Absolutely have a fit. You're entitled. Possibly throw the ball against the wall see if it changes colour. Be sure to go on Facebook and tell the world you are unhappy. We feel your pain but we cannot do anything about it other than nodding our heads up and down and pushing the unhappy face.
Yarn is in Hank Format
Hmmm, you bought it. Spare me the drama! There are inventions calls Yarn Swifts and ball winders. Usually, yarn stores and I am talking the independents usually have the service to wind it to a ball if you ask them.
If not, ask a friend to hold the hank open and wind it with your own hands. If they won't, find the leverage point to push them into sacrificing some time for you.
It generally means the yarn is of higher quality when in hank format. It costs more money to wind a ball for a ball band than into hank format. Besides, it's pretty.
Yarn is Tangling Up Coming Out of The Ball
What are you? NEW? It happens. Just be patient, breathe and possibly do some yoga if it's upsetting you so you can go at that ball with calmness and gently finger it to open up the tangle.
If you really want to set yourself into raging fits of anger, pull on it hard and really tangle that sucker up. It will put you in heavy mood swings and the first person you see is going to get a tongue lashing.
It happens, it's just the yarn gawds reminding you that you are not in charge and to be a nicer person. Seriously though, just be patient. If this is the worst of your day, I think you are probably having a better day than others.
Yarn Colour is Discontinued
I have this really uncanny luck of designing something new and not checking my balls, I mean shelves, to see if I have enough. Only to realize midway that I am out and that wishing for new yarn to suddenly appear doesn't seem to work.
I have been such an ass where I know I don't have enough stuck and keep thinking a ball will just show up in a place that I didn't expect. Meanwhile, I am stressed about it.
Yes, I get caught with my pants down, metaphorically speaking, with realizing that I didn't buy enough yarn. Sometimes I buy just 1 ball of yarn just because it's pretty. But it like popcorn, you cannot just have one heaping handful, you have to push several handfuls down my trap and push it down with a gigantic pop! Wait, am I am getting too personal!
It happens and it sucks. People like new choices and things change. Give the yarn to someone else, maybe they have the complimentary colours.
Cannot Find the Interior Strand
I can always find my interior strands. Sometimes though, it's like I have dug into the pits of hell to get it but I got it. Does it make me happy when that tricky little tail is difficult to find, not really. But once I got to the end, the joy I feel and relief is worth it.
New machines today are taking this account where there's a tail hanging out to prevent the treasure hunting. Some of the equipment rolling yarn balls are from two or more generations again that is still in use. Changing equipment means higher yarn costs. I like my yarn to be as cheap as possible, so I will gladly dig.
I'm going in girls and boys! I'm a pro!
I hate Winding Skeins to Balls
Um really! Why are you doing that anyway? Do you have that much time on your hands?! Find the interior strand and pull it from the centre or pull from the outside. Save the drama!
If it's a personal preference that you do that... then suck it up! I don't want to hear it, button it!
Crap, I rolled my eyes so hard, they are stuck in the back of my head! I mean seriously...
The Project is the Wrong Colour But I Settled
Ummm, you know that's a choice you made, eh! If you think the colour is wrong when you started and are feeling it while making it... why continue? Am I missing something fundamental here?
Yeah, I have crocheted with colours I settled for and didn't absolutely love it but it was my own choice that made me be unhappy.
Changing Yarn Balls with So Many Tails
So many tails... like so... so... so many tails. Weaving in tail ends means the project is progressing and for those who leave it to the end and cuss it out. You left it to the end instead of dealing with it as you went. Yeah, your project is looking like a rug hooking project but just breathe and get out the tapestry needle and do it already.
Don't waste time and complain about it on social media. You could have secured a few tails while trying to figure out what to say. Then you will waste more time checking to see what people responded to.
In the end, the yarn arts as a hobby and meant to enjoy. Nothing in life is ever perfect but for most of us, the pride we feel in finishing a project is second to none. So you have a few speed bumps... I bet you are probably thinking about your next project already! So it's not that bad... right!?
Leave me a comment in the blog here for things you find that annoys you about yarn.
Chris says
Loved this! Thanks for the smile this morning. ?
Ruth Richardson says
Love your wit and sarcasm!
Too many people would be pissed if they suddenly found themselves being happy about something/anything and rolling with the punches. I think there's a bit of laziness involved as well (re-winding skeins to balls, excavating for the yarn end, etc. Waa, waa, waa!
Great recap - Thanks Mikey.
Ruth
Bruce Glassford says
Oh you’re on a roll today 🙂 My complaint is that my yarn either multiplies (if I’m trying to stash bust) or vanishes (if I’m working on a limited colourway) - I had three skeins when I started and I’m finishing the second and the third has vanished. Of course it usually turns up later after I’ve frogged and done something that needs less yarn.